Ever felt like...

everything you did up to this moment in your life has been a mistake?
you are the biggest failure in this world?
nothing will ever come out of all your effort scouring the internet for jobs and sending application after application for over a year?
you just want to drop everything and run back home where you feel safe to show how you truly feel without being judged?
you are so physically and mentally drained without doing anything of importance at all?
you are marching on the spot, or worse, you are in a pit of quicksand, slowly being sucked into it and the more you struggle, the faster you sink?
you are stuck in this deep rut that narrows as it reaches toward the sky so that even light has trouble entering and as you grope around desperately, blindly, you don't feel any hand/footholds to climb out?
you are sick and tired of pretending that everything is rosy, of smiling when you don't feel like you can smile anymore at the world?

I wonder how much longer I can wear this mask of nonchalance when it feels like I am crumbling up into a million pieces inside...