You'll be gone in an instant.

Pain. is. not. relative. or is it?

Depressed.

My first culling since I started work. I won't go into the details. Let's just say, carbon dioxide chamber then cervical dislocation (to make sure they are gone). :( It's not the first time I'm culling, so why do I feel like this? I've mainly sacrificed mice before and that have been hard at times too. I usually try to detach myself and do it robotically. I suppose the bigger the animal, the worse I feel. I had to perform a decapitation on a rat once before and after that it was the men's job. Besides, the rats I used to use were much much more aggressive than the ones I have now, so somehow, (though it's not right to think like this) it was easier to swallow the fact that we had to kill them.

The strain/species of rats I am using now are so docile and nice that they let you pick them up and be cuddled and held. Extremely cute! :) The ones in the past were so fierce you can't pick them up without wearing an extra thick leather glove.

I so have to get over this. There would be tons of culling sessions in the future. :(