Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Writing from Genova

From Stuttgart Flughafen to Paris CDG, then Aeroporti di Roma before finally reaching my destination, Genova. Spanning 3 borders, 3 languages, 2 of which I felt at home with.

The journey wasn't as bad as I had imagined it would be. Though I had barely slept an hour on Sun, doing some last-minute touchups on my presentations. Managed to catch a few winks on the 3 short flights I was on.

Genova has an interesting landscape, in that it is sandwiched between mountains just behind it and the sea in front of it. I walked around the old town and the port a little yesterday afternoon, after I arrived. Tried focaccia and spaghetti with pesto, 2 of the specialties here. The fresh pesto is quite different from the ones you get in a bottle, of cos. Much much nicer. And the focaccia is excellent, though a bit oily, since they drizzle over the bread a generous dose of oil (olive oil I believe?).
The city's full of tall (relatively speaking, for Europe) buildings because they have land constraints due to their perculiar landscape. It is as chaotic (a good word would be lifely) as little Tuebingen is neat and orderly (in the way Germans are).

Talk/interview went well. *Phew* The big people were happy with it and hence had, just now, offered me a PhD position, starting next Jan. And in between August and then, a few months of work in the lab with some sort of stipend. So now, the ball's on my court. And how I dread decisions... Sigh... And it seems that for me, there's never any clear winning side. There's always pros and cons to one and the other. In this Genova institute, I like how they are very similar to the structure of a pharma and the work that is scheduled to be done here (the labs are work in progress but the department will officially be opened in April). They said they'd match the PhD salary I'd get in Germany and throwing in possibly 8-9months in California, in the pharmacology lab of the Prof who's also the director of this department.

But on the other hand, I have grown to like the peace and quiet of Tuebingen, and the friends I've made, my church, and I know my way around the labs which I have worked in. Moving would mean I would have to start all over. I really don't know. And I really don't want to make a bad decision (as I felt I have for my Master thesis), this would affect the next 3-4 years of my life!

I don't have to reply them straightaway so I will have some time to sleep on it. I don't want to think about it now really. Guess I will go back to the hotel now and rest. Another long trip tomorrow...
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Sunday, February 14, 2010

The last 2 days, back in an all too familiar situation; stuck alone underground with animals (mice this time) the whole day (not that I disliked it, I was quite happy to be back on acquainted territory), my mind drifted off, it being dispensable in the routineness of the tasks and where the quietness of the room proved to be conducive for a trip down memory lane. As if viewing a short film in my head, random images, of past events, places, people, flashed before my mind's eye.

It felt like I was an outsider, sneaking a peak into someone else's life or a distant past, familiar, yet foreign. Age does that to you, maybe? I barely recognise myself in the treasured pictures sitting on my desk in front of me, pictures I brought from home. On Skype this morning with my family, even the room I shared with my sister has changed; it's no longer ours, but hers. Has my nephew started primary school? The little one whom I used carry in my arms to hoax him to sleep? And there's a second one I haven't met. In a recent email from a good friend, 'Haha coming back eh. A lot of changes in SG. It's like they renovated the skyline. You should have fun exploring.' Exploring?? Me?? A tourist in the home I grew up in?
The world has gone ahead with her revolutions and left me behind, running, panting, struggling to catch up.

Have I aged so much in the past year and a few months? Do I like who I am now? What have I achieved, if anything, by choosing this path?

Maybe, just maybe, if I had a chance to do over, I would have chosen to stay home, maintain the status quo then and not try to be so ambitious.

But, there's no way back now though, is there???

I refused to let the moistness in my eyes flow over. I will not cry.
So, try as I would, I would finish this route I started out on. The last bit is always the hardest, isn't it?

To all my friends and loved ones out there, I wish you happiness (definitely something I need now eh?), content and health in this Lunar New Year. Oh, and a happy Valentine's day too.
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Just for today

If it were the last thing on earth I could wish for, I want to be home, just for today.
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Friday, February 05, 2010

Putting Descartes before the horse

was a phrase I learnt while reading the International Herald Tribune's article on Tuesday, "Trace of Thought Is Found in ‘Vegetative’ Patient".

So that little random bit of did-you-know aside, I think work's slowly, albeit very slowly, moving and that helps me feel a bit better. Someone said to me lately, the results do not matter so much, it's whether you show scientific reasoning (or a scientific way of going about the experiments) in your thesis that matters. I sure hope this is true...

A good friend of mine (also my German 'teacher', she really helped me a lot with learning the language) has invited me to go to her parents' place in Aalen for the weekend. I reckon it'd be nice to spend time with a German family. Am looking forward to it! :) Though I'll probably have to try to get some work done (prepare for my interview/talk in Italy in a couple of weeks) while I'm there, with my laptop in toll.

Have a good weekend, peeps. ^_^
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